The problem

The problem isn’t you.

The problem isn’t even him.

The problem isn’t your expectations.

It’s not even the way he’s always distant

even when he’s so close your skin

and breathing-

and heartbeat

become one.

The problem isn’t that this feeling flows from the heart of your being

but gets stuck in your throat like vomit.

It’s not even how something so fucking beautiful

could morph into something so hideous

The problem isn’t that he made you cry

even when you said you wouldn’t.

It’s not even that you stayed longer

longer than you said you would.

The problem is that you cared too much for

someone who cared just enough.

The problem is your heart.

The problem is you broke the promise you made to yourself

to never love anyone who wasn’t ready to love you back.

The problem is your heart,

-your own flesh and blood-

keeps betraying you

because it won’t look before it falls.

Vanessa Roseway